As the Sundays pass by…

A few Sundays have gone by, and my mind has been so cluttered that even writing has been difficult for me.  I usually take moments like these and spend multiple times of the day making simple journal entries or something of the sort.  As a year has passed for my existence as I know it there are so many moments and experiences to reflect back on, not only in this past year, but in my adult life.  Wanting to learn from, and choose the moments that have been uplifting to ground me, allowing me to truly know the best path for myself and children.

Looking back exactly a year, have I grown? Have I been stagnant? Have I fallen behind? The answer is yes, to all of these questions as they pertain to different aspects in my life.  Learning to not only recognize my own shortcomings, but accept that I have made accomplishments, are the ways to what I seek for enlightenment.  Inner peace and love, is what will complete my journey, it has been a long rocky path with many stumbles, filled with self-doubt and angst.  As I look ahead, letting go and leaving pain that cannot be changed, sadness that must be left behind, looking around at all the beauty in my life and those who want to share it with me is all that I need to know my path has a few stretches that I will be able to move freely without wavering.

The Beginning

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As a woman who imagined I would only be a wife and mother for all of my life, the idea of becoming an individual has been an extreme challenge for me.  To slowly accept the passing of my marriage, has been a road traveled that I could have never foreseen.  I have stepped off the path of dignity at times forgetting my true purpose, to support and love my youngest daughter, by showing her the way, by example. Though I can look back and dwell on my regrets, I choose to rise from my ashes and prove myself to be the woman who I was meant to be. With this, I will begin my journey to stay sober, and learn to deal with problems in a healthy way.  I hope to improve my writing skills, continue to capture images of our beautiful world, and most of all strengthen myself and my lovely Julia.

For our first picnic the plans changed, and we chose this beautiful spot, our front yard.  Quilt and pillows, lazing about.